Relationships
Relationships are often overlooked as much as bad as that sounds. This piece of the pillar system is quite substantial. Remember the last time you thought the popular kid had all the opportunity and all of the luck. It seemed very unfair simply because from the outside looking in it was portrayed as though they didn't do well in school yet were still able to accomplish more than you were. Well this has very much to do with the types of networking and relationships they built based on the school setting. See nowadays school, as well as the entire world is all social media based. Before, maybe about 10 years ago or so, this was already happening with kids on a smaller scale. Instead of globally it was locally through certain schools but was mostly all encompassed internally. Now so in this day and age it is not the case. Influence is everywhere, and as influence has pointed out before it is not always the best decision maker.
It is always important to take into account that saying, “you are the top three to five people you associate yourself with.” The people you are around have everything to do with where you are, but I also believe exposure and environment play a role here as well. Audit who it is you spend your time around and briefly compare similarities and differences in your lives. If you can see more than a few in either direction the results become more clear. This is when the time comes to focus on who it is you are and if you need to take a step back to figure out what it is that makes you tick. Most people will try and tell you they're doubts and fears based on their own perception but if this is the case you may not need them in your life anyway.
Strip Smaller Weight
You do not need extra smaller weight, we are heavy as it is. So free yourself as best you can. The lighter you become, the lighter you feel. Learn to strip the weights that are not benefiting gains. In Fitness and weight lifting you have to do more reps with smaller weight and you will eventually grow somewhat bigger but you will mostly grow limited strength. Whereas pushing the resistance and upping the weight will give you growth and strength. You've got to level up the weight if you want to level up in life. An easy way to plateau is to stay with the same routine and weights. Change things up and keep yourself guessing. The more people you connect with the deeper your significance in life feels as a whole, and social interaction is an extremely effective way to combat anxiety and depression. Given that you are able to communicate, more often than not these true friends, spouses or partners are the ones that are there to make sure you are staying the course. They will notice things wrong with you before you will know you are showing it. Some are incredibly good at faking it but typically it will show through behavior. The ones that it is hard for are the secluded ones. Where you disconnect with everyone and feel as though nobody cares. When you notice that it is only due to lack of communication and your unwillingness to figure out how to verbalize these emotions. If you truly have no one or feel you have no one start a social media account right now and do not post at all. Just engage and find people with similar interest and begin to form friendships. Just because media and other outlets spew out stats on why social media is a detriment to our society when its able to reach people from all parts of the globe and interconnect like minded people for these very scenarios. The problem lies in the inability to effectively engage. Most people simply like pictures and comment some trash talk because someone has it better than them. Instead of picking people up and truly relating to another human being. Stay inside of your real persona and be yourself because people tend to lose who they are once they start posting. Just stay humble and stay the course, but try to make friends because we are naturally social being so it's in our biology to interact and seek to be understood.
Romantic Relationships
This also goes the same for romantic relationships as well. Do not meddle unless you are serious and also in addition to this, allow yourself to be with someone that is both going to push you to grow, and also has the potential to grow with you simultaneously. It is important to realize that growing separately is entirely different when being compared to growing together, and even in just knowing that can make all of the difference. The idea of communication is crucial, so if you have not yet had friends or have established connections with people I wouldn't even recommend getting into a relationship at all. People with lack of connection tend to get overwhelmed by all of the emotions that are triggered with having a whole other human and their emotions as well. It can be a lot to bear at one time for some, and what happens if this is the case is those people feel as though something is wrong, and begins to act distant, not as consistent when it comes to things like their daily mood. It will fluctuate and it will seem as though you are kind of trapped after while, which in turn can lead to breakups, divorce, domestic violence, infidelity, all stemming from you unwilling to communicate your feelings into actual words. I realize this can be difficult but that is why it's always best to practice because we all get better with it when we consciously practice this.
A Step Further
Even taking communication a step further, if you're ordering from a drive thru how thorough are you with that order? Very! Because you know how many times the miscommunication lead to a wrong burger, or missing fries again. It is so vital to be clear and concise with the ways we feel but not get too emotionally involved so we can keep the clearest mind possible. Feel what you feel and express it in a way that is both practical and will allow the other person to feel like you are talking too them and not at them. Just genuinely be willing to be vulnerable. That is what a relationship is and ultimately what love is. To accept the vulnerabilities within ourselves as well as others. So talk about feelings do not let them take the wheel. You can talk about the kids and to the kids while their in the back seat. Emotions are like children in the back seat. If you want more quiet and composed ride you just may have to acknowledge your emotions a bit more.
In Conclusion
So keep the relationships that you have with everyone in your life strong, concise and to the point. What I've found is that many people waste time on things that don't matter so also figure out what matters to you during this process. People will love fitness for two weeks and then jump typically to nursing or simply cannot stop discussing gossip and drama. Then next month their into scuba diving and the next month they are so impacted and become a vegan. How many people do you know like this? Just so unsure of what the next move is. Well it isn't scuba diving. Unless you truly love scuba diving then go for what you love! The problem most people have is this switching, going back and forth with figuring out what you like to do. Then on top of that have to have a job, so now it's almost as if your time will be taken up by work, children(if you have them), netflix, going to the grocery store, cooking dinner, then bed. So build more relationships with people like minded and that encourage what you're doing. It's okay to go back and forth but really do it with an intent of finding that one thing. What is truly important is that you are open and allow people to help you with ideas or just inspiration in general. The more genuine the relationship the better you can become surrounded by the right people.
